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PostHeaderIcon What If Phil Dunphy Shopped Online?

Article Source: Online Shopping Store

Surely Phil Dunphy shops online from time to time, right? Here is how I envision the star of Modern Family going about it at his favorite online retailers.


Having been a football cheerleader in college, Phil is an avid sports fan. As you may remember, he recounted those days by saying “Cheerleading in my college was cool. The football players were so jealous they wouldn’t even let me and my buddies, Trevor, Scotty and Ling go to their parties.” So I envision Phil shopping online at Sports Authority and being so distraught with the lack of male cheerleading garb that he storms out of the house where nothing but his boxer briefs with his pom-poms in full view.


We all know Phil is an Apple geek. In fact he was quoted as saying, “The iPad comes out on my actual birthday. It’s like Steve Jobs and God got together to say, “We love you, Phil.” So I see Phil standing in the virtual line at the Apple Store on the day before a big release pressing the refresh button every 5 seconds until the iPhone 5 is finally on sale so he can spend a ridiculous amount of money on a phone that is only slightly better than the one already in his shirt pocket.


Phil is also quite the outdoorsman, and if you remember, he secretly wants to be a cowboy. In fact, in regards to his cowboying abilities, he once said “I’ve been practicing like crazy all of my cowboy skills, shootin’, ropin’, pancake eatin’. Why? Because sometimes I feel like Jay doesn’t respect me as a man.” Phil spends hours perusing the Cabela’s website looking for the newest and greatest “tough guy”gear. Chaps, waders, camouflage pants, various ropes, you name it, he wants it. But respect is earned, not bought, and Phil best be getting home to start whipping up some fluffy Bisquick flap jacks.

While Phil enjoys an adult beverage from time to time, he always tries to keep his daughters away from the stuff. In fact, in response to his daughter question about Jägermeister, his retort was pure brilliance, “You know how in a fairy tale there’s always a potion that makes the princess fall asleep and then the guys start kissing her? Well, this is like that except you don’t wake up in a castle — you wake up in a frat house with a bad reputation.” Wow, not sure where to go from there. Let’s see, BevMo…Jägermeister…princesses…nope, I got nothing.


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If you like all this stuff here then you can buy me a pack of cigarettes.

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